Dialysis Book: Part 3: The goblin Warren

A bleary eyed Eggard frowned at his incompetent assistant, “You said it was lightly guarded.”

“Yesterday it was,” Savina replied hotly.  “I was just here and there wasn’t a goblin in sight.”

The elf warrior stared down at the dozen goblins guarding the entrance, several of whom had been replaced since dawn when they started surveying the area.  There was even a bug bear, obviously a spellcaster, looking angry that he’d been summoned from whatever breeding pit in the warrens he’d been serving in.

The fact that one of those mutant goblins was on guard duty was horrible.  That meant the goblins had enough bugbears to actually use them as guards, which was the sign of a mature goblin warren.

This morning just kept getting worse.  All night, an adventurer had been killing rats under the floorboards of the inn.  That was to be expected in such rural accommodations, Eggard supposed, but the end result of the attacks had kept him up the entire night and since he was already awake Savina thought of something to do, repeatedly.  After a full day of travel and his activities with Savina, all he wanted was a few hours of sleep and he was denied even that.

He felt his hand tremble slightly, a minor thing, but it showed the elf how tired he was.  He needed to concentrate.  He could sleep on the airship tomorrow.  He had to be on the airship to the dominion tomorrow, or he might as well slit his own throat.  His lady’s fury would be so great, it would be like walking into a…

“Is that a hob,” he asked as a full blooded hobgoblin stepped into the entrance and started ordering around all the goblins, and the bugbear.

Savina groaned, the last thing they needed to fight was one of those castrated goblin bastards.  Rarely, if a goblin tribe had too many bugbears, they would castrate one.  That caused the bugbear’s hair to fall out and turned them from casters to vicious warriors, “I swear, they were not here yesterday.”

“I don’t see how that matters, they are here now,” spat Eggard doing the math.  He could probably take a bugbear or a hobgoblin with all their friends, but he certainly couldn’t do both at the same time.  Further attacking them would probably bring up even more bugbears from the warren, or worse more hobgoblins.

Bugbears would stun you, bind you, ensorcele you using goblin magics.  All of those were preferable to what those castrated monsters would do to you if they caught you.  It was hard to believe that goblins and hobs were from the same species, but there was a reason why there was a hob system lord, and Lord Gol’Nik ascension had been truly brutal.

“Something must have rattled them,” said Savina desperately.  She was to scout, and then support him in his efforts to steal the treasure.  Savina had been quite clear about her lack of desire to actually enter the warren when goblins were present.

That wasn’t unexpected though, all he had to worry about was his two best friends and his life he supposed.  Savina would certainly suffer a worse fate, somewhere.  He doubted the goblins would keep her, but she would certainly fetch a high price to one of the slaver houses that the goblins worked with.

Well, if such a fate befell her all the better.  She hadn’t been paid yet, and given that her job was to scout he was debating paying her at all.  Savina wasn’t stupid though, she realized the problem right away.

“Wait, I have an idea,” she began.  “At breakfast, the innkeeper mentioned that the adventurer was successful.”

“Yes, he killed off some rats,” said Eggard.  “That’s about the level of skill I’d expect from a local adventurer.”

Savina shook her head, “No, that means there is a working adventure in town and we could summon him for a quest.”

“He’d be an idiot to attack a goblin warren,” said Eggard.

“He attacked a king rat in its lair,” said Savina.  She was confident that’s what she heard, Eggard was less so but whatever rat the adventurer fought had been large.  When he obviously didn’t get the point she continued, “What’s something they drill into you not to do with king rats.”

Eggard shook his head, he had little time for stupid adventure maxims, he only knew a few.  One of those few came to mind, “Never fight a king rat in his lair, because it will bite your head off.”

“So he’s stupid,” she said flatly.

“Okay,” replied Eggard.  “How does this help us?”

“I’ll offer a 10 gold piece reward to the guild for him to investigate the warren,” said Savina.  “He’ll be here in less than an hour.”

“That’s not a terrible plan,” said Eggard.  He could use a nap, and there was no way they were getting in without some sort of distraction.  Better, he didn’t even need the adventure.  He could sneak in if the opportunity presented itself, and the adventurer would die anyway so they weren’t going to have to pay him.”

Plus of course, that jerk kept him up all night.  And a bored Savina always found something gross to do.

“Cast the spell,” he said and Savina relaxed.  She walked over and spoke the magic words, converting essence into magic.  A moment later a glowing white bird appeared in her hand and she whispered the quest into its ear and handed it a small pouch of coins.

When the spell finished, the bird shot into the air and then flew towards the town at speeds far faster than any bird crafted from flesh and bone.

Eggard realized the problem almost immediately, "What quest did you offer the adventurer?"

"I sent him on an express quest to find the item," said Savina.

"You what?" said Eggard.  "You realize that is what we are looking for?"

"Yeah, and if he somehow manages to find it he'll be quest bound to hand it over," said Savina, "Assuming that he somehow lives to manage that."

Meaning that stupid adventurer would have to show himself to Eggard, and 10 gold pieces would hardly compare to the cost of the item, or a good night's sleep.  In fact, he could probably get a refund afterward, violently if necessary.  All in all, that wasn't a terrible plan.

“What is the cut off time,” said Eggard.

“Tomorrow, before the flight,” said Savina.  Eggard was annoyed, because anyone could see where that wind was blowing.  Anyone looking at the item would be able to tell it was elvish at a glance, and requiring it in hand right before the airship left made the destination obvious.

Then again no one was looking for them, probably.  There was a slim shot the local Duke was paying attention to his lands enough that he might have noticed a System Lord sniffing around.

Not that it mattered, while the elven race was pitiful and only had a singular System Lord, the humans lacked even that.  Their last System Lord died during the fairy uprising, during the sparkle fest.

Obviously the System Lord was done in by other System Lords, but still the notion that the Human’s rising star had been shattered by fairies during a religious holiday dedicated to glitter was enough to bring a smile to Eggard’s face.

Eggand realized there were no better options.  This whole fiasco was coming to a conclusion.  He would either find the relic and sleep on the ship, or he’d die fighting goblins in their warren.  Either case was acceptable to the exhausted elf.

With that decided, Eggard relaxed while keeping one eye on the main entrance.  He half wondered if he should look for a back entrance, but in this mountain range he could spend days or even weeks looking.

Best to just rest and prepare.