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The Marathon: Two Thumbs Down BOX OFFICE!

The proper proprietors are programming once more, providing the people of our parish with a pair of marathons, derived from the original TWO THUMBS DOWN Draft with Matt Singer and Jordan Hoffman, that promise to please!

The Majestic Marker is presenting an appealing package of auteur-driven delights, while across the street The Gopher is serving up summer fun for the whole family.

Which theater will be earning your Draft Dollars? Buy your ticket now!

Le Marmotte

Amenities: Restrooms, Seats, Wine Bar, Wisconsin Fried Cheese Curd Croque Monsieur Sandwich Stand, Basic Concessions, Cleaning Crew, Video Arcade with Lost World: Jurassic Park, Turtles in Time, and TNG Pinball, Jean-Luc Gophard Mascots, HVAC, Lobby Sound System & DJ Booth, The Gopher Hole Coffee Bar, Bed & Breakfast, La Marmonorail (Communal), ICEE Machine, Dunkin' Express Location, Pre-show Trivia, Organ, Aesthetic Fog Machine, Crimson Tide Popcorn Vessel, 70mm/35mm Projector, Basketball Hoop, Cool Carpet, Screen Drafts Hall of Fame Museum (Communal), Dolby Atmos, Hawaiian Shaved Ice Corner, Vast Red Curtain Wall Covering, Outdoor Screening Package, The Marker Horrific Haunted House (Seasonal), Karaoke Korner, McCleod Ale + Bartender Duncan MacCleod, "Saint" Nick Smith Meet-and-Greet (Seasonal), "Trou De Gloire" with live music from Jeff Goldblum and the Mildred Snitzer Orchestra (Permanently Closed), Cinema Sight & Sound Bath, Professional Theater Cats, Rooftop Sea Food Restaurant "Les Poissons", CinemaScope Lens, "Back to the '50s" Concessions (Budget Dependent), 3D Popcorn Bucket Printer, Piadina, 4DX SEATING AREA (NEW), ADA SEATING AREA (NEW)

6pm: Twister

8pm: The Hudsucker Proxy

10pm: Beetlejuice

12am: The Last Action Hero (70mm)

The Marker Majestic

Amenities: Seats, Restrooms, Merch, Cleaning Crew, HVAC, Basic Concessions, 35mm Projector, Security Team, Rooftop Smoker's Lounge, Red Carpet Step-and-Repeat, Coffee Bar, Jacuzzi, Jacuzzi Band - The Diaper Doobies, Dolby Atmos, Shappy Soft Pretzels, ADA Seating, Fancy Reclining Seats, Aesthetic Seat Trays, Toilet Stall Screens, Lending Library, Sparkling Water, Childcare Center, George Foreman Hibachi Grill, CBD Shots, Children's T-Shirts, Hotel for Dogs (Communal), T-shirt Cannon, Popcorn Drizzle, Waterslide, Half Gallon Coffee Mug with Golden Diaper Emblem, Booster Gold Mani / Pedi Station, Trailer Boys App, Poppins' Fried Poppers , JOLT Cola, Costume & Makeup Wing, Pea Soup Poppers, 35mm Trailers, Trailer Boy trading cards, European-style Sex Club (Permanently Closed), Japanese Smart Toilets, Outdoor Screening Package, Basement Dog Grooming Parlor (Permanently Closed), Cereal Bar w/ discontinued cereals, Cosmic Concessions - Flying Saucer Candy, Astronaut Ice Cream, Captain Crunch's Cozmic Crunch, Giselle's Enchanted Tiki Grotto (Permanently Closed), NICKELODEON SHOWING "WHERE IN THE WORLD IS KAI?" (NEW)

6pm: Stealing Beauty

8pm: Color of Money (35mm)

10pm: Johnny Dangerously

12am: Reservoir Dogs

Comments

I was really torn on this one but going to Marker Majestic. Beetlejuice is an annual watch for me, but it's better at home while carving pumpkins. The Stealing Beauty VHS cover is such a specific video rental memory for me, assumed it was the sexiest movie that existed and definitely watched it too young because I was obsessed with That Thing You Do and Liv Tyler. Excited to see it again as an adult instead of someone who was hoping that's what my love life would end up as. Extremely excited for Johnny Dangerously, with Blank Check covering Amy Heckerling I've just been thinking about how wonderful she is. Plus, embarrassingly, I have never seen Reservoir Dogs, and midnight in the theater seems like the perfect introduction, just may need to limit my visits to the roof to make sure I'm up for it. Also, I think that a Diaper Doobies cover of "Hooked on a Feeling" could be amazing...less because of the song more because they could dress in diapers and dance like the Ally McBeal dancing baby. And as someone in a few bluegrass bands I've been thinking the next project would be forming yet another Diaper Doobies cover band, maybe the Diaper Dobros? Not quite the same ring...I'll work on that

Caitlin

I had to turn the spaceship around because I forgot to mention that I think it would be fun to have a special (maybe once a year) marathon using a 13 film mini-mega draft list. It can be a day long movie festival marathon with 7 films at each theatre. The drafting phase and the programming would be very interesting. Start at Noon, 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, Midnight.

Scortenborg

My name is Scortenborg. It has been a long journey but I have finally found my brother’s ship in your Draftland. Sadly, I see his ship crashed and he has passed on. Not so sadly, he wasn’t a good brother. Intrigued, I noticed signs around town talking about a marathon. I did some research and saw a marathon is 26 miles, further research showed that these Draftland marathons involve what you call movies and there have been 26 of them. I am a fan of numbers and decided I must attend this marathon of marathons. 26 marathons in 26 days. I have what you call alien technology that allows me to enter media and interact with it but I can only enter it once so I had to pick between the Marker Majestic and La Marmotte and not use my technology to enter both theatres for the marathons. My results are as follows: I attended La Marmotte 8 Times (Erotic Thrillers, Christmas Adjacent, Razzies, Jerry Bruckheimer, Mixtape, Horror Sequels, 1950’s Sci-fi and Amy Adams). I attended the Marker Majestic all other times. The only film I watched twice was called Showgirls and I watched it at both theaters. Compliments to the owners. The staff at your respective locations were impeccable. Chet treated me like a king up on the rooftop and rolled me a tube to smoke that made me feel like I was travelling through hyperspace. Eugene was surprised to see me at first but when he realized I wasn’t going to take him with me he invited me back to his room to show me his toys. The last marathon I attended was the Two Thumbs down Marathon at the Majestic, this brings my total visits to the Majestic to 18/26 which is 69% of the time. I am told that is a very nice number. Soon I must board my ship to travel back home but before I leave, I have decided to leave some of my technology hidden around Draftland. If you find it, you may use it.

Scortenborg


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